”Hanky Panky” 1982
“Woman In Red” wasn’t a particularly great movie. But, I had decided to explore Gene Wilder films. Never having heard of this one I was able to approach it with a fresh perspective. I was surprised when Gilda Radner appeared early in the film. Though she had the smallest role she turned out to be the most memorable part of the movie. She was like an exciting splash of vivid color in a dull, black and white film!
As I prepared for a two week work trip I decided to take the opportunity to read Gene Wilder’s autobiography “Kiss Me Like A Stranger.” The book was fantastic and written in the gentle manner that I associated with his persona. I read it entirely in his voice!
”Woman in Red” 1984
What came as a surprise to me was that he and Gilda had been married! I knew so little about either of them. I knew Gene from “Young Frankenstein” (and a few other films) And I knew Gilda Rander had been one of the original “Not Ready For Prime Time Players” and that she had passed on early. But that was the extent of it.
As the book unfolded, I discovered that I was getting very caught up in the story, especially about Gilda. But I felt that Gene was sometimes too blunt or aloof about many things regarding Gilda. He was shockingly frank about the strain her personality and illness had on them. But it seemed as if there was a lot missing from the tale. So, as I finished the final chapter of “ Kiss Me Like a Stranger” I ordered Gilda’s book “It’s Always Something.”
The book arrived the next day and I dove right in. She began her story around 1981 ( when she met Gene) and wove in vignettes of her past as the story moved on. Her personality burst off the pages with energy, excitement, enthusiasm and her special brand of brash, playful humor.
I watched another movie called “Hanky Panky” ( which is how she actually met Gene ) There was something in her performance that I couldn’t put my finger on. Something about her seemed to transcend the role. As the book progressed, she revealed that even she could see in her performance that all she was thinking was “I wonder if he likes me?” She was smitten to say the least and made it her “Full-time job” to marry Gene from then on.
They wed in 1984. Gilda said “My life went from black and white to Technicolor.”
“Gene and I in ‘Hanky Panky.’ Enemy agents are after us as we plan our escape through the desert. All I care about is whether Gene likes me.”
~Gilda Radnor “It’s Always Something”
Slowly the brightness of her light was overcast by a dark venomous cloud. She told an almost day-by-day account of the next few years from 1986 to 1989 in excruciating detail. As hard as it was to read, I could not put the book down.
She described each and every emotion, person and procedure that she experienced and endured with exceptional clarity, candor, humor and grace. Knowing the outcome made reading about the beginning of her battle infuriating! She was misdiagnosed repeatedly. By the time her doctors found something, she was in stage IV of ovarian cancer with a tumor the size of grapefruit! Then she began the nightmare of the endless treatments which sounded like walking through the deepest pits of Hell itself. Her existence became a never ending cycle of horror, fear, depression, anxiety, anger, hope, joy, laughter, humiliation, triumph, defeat, love, loneliness and community. But throughout she had people around her that loved her unconditionally and believed that she would pull through. Though she was terrified and angry, she gained the hard earned wisdom of living each day to the fullest extent of her ability and to accept life’s uncertainties.
“One April afternoon, three weeks before she died, Gilda walked up to me in our living room and said, “I have a title for you. ‘Kiss Me Like A Stranger’…maybe you can use it someday.”
~page 250. Gene Wilder “Kiss Me Like A Stranger”
May 1987
If you are still reading this then it should be obvious that the story of Gilda and Gene sincerely captured my attention and emotions. It is a strange thing to be so gripped by a story that took place decades ago and involved people whom I never knew personally. I suppose some people can have a meaningful effect on us, even from afar.
Gilda’s story is rich with joy and cursed with tragedy. She brought the gift of laughter to every life she touched. There is so much more to the story of both Gilda and Gene, too much to cover here. (So, go read both of these books!)
I read Gene’s first. In retrospect I should have read Gilda’s first as it was written 16 years before Gene’s. I think understanding how much time had passed in between is necessary to empathize with Gene making whatever peace he needed to. Gene was able to wrap up his final chapter with a touching story about how Gilda gave him what would later become the title of his book. Gilda’s book, on the other hand, ended with a sense of ambiguity. She told a brief childhood story about a tragic event involving a pet. Perhaps she was trying to say “Life goes on” ? (“It’s Always Something” was released a month after Gilda passed.)
Since finishing both books I have enjoyed discovering Gilda’s performances on SNL, almost all of which I had never seen or did not recall. Last night I watched “Gilda: Live!” I can’t stop imitating her saying “Rosanne Roseannadanna” to myself and laughing out loud!
“While we have the gift of life, it seems to me the only tragedy is to allow part of us to die–whether it is our spirit, our creativity or our glorious uniqueness.”
~page 139 Gilda Radnor “It’s Always Something”
• Gilda Radnor, June 28, 1946-May 20, 1989
• Gene Wilder, June 11, 1933-August 29, 2016
Mark Anderson Mills
June 23rd, 2023
Note: Here are two articles I have discovered since writing this that shed some light on a few more details about Gilda.
https://people.com/celebrity/gene-wilder-dies-inside-his-love-story-with-gilda-radner/
https://people.com/movies/gene-wilders-tearful-goodbye-to-wife-gilda-radner/
Mark Anderson Mills 
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